February 28, 2011

• Back on the Homefront....

  While Gabe was on a business trip this past week in Tennessee working very hard AND eating Filet Mignon most nights (or some other rare food I consider a mere delicacy and only dream of eating should I get lucky on my birthday or our anniversary) as well as probably walking around too much on his foot (now diagnosed as a "high" ankle sprain which can take just as long apparently as a break to heal!) the kids and I drove the short two and half hours to be with my family.

  It was SO.much.fun!

  How very thankful I am for family. My family. My parents. My sisters. My in-laws (we even got to spend a day with them!) Who love us. And made our stay extra special just by being able to be with them. I knew it would be the perfect little oasis to a rather seemingly long and lonely week otherwise without Gabe. It was all of that and more.

  But wow, I missed that Gabe of mine. Yes, even in between the distractions of a late night Zumba class with my sisters for my first time (hilarious!), being pulled on a sled behind the snowmobile all while being chased by Ruby, and staying up late to watch movies...I just missed him. The last time he went somewhere for a week was when Asher was about 7 months. I know husbands go away a lot, or have to, and not necessarily that they want to. Life/work sometimes just calls. As much as I miss him when he's away, these little few and far between absences are somewhat welcomed to reveal, yet again, how truly thankful I am for him! How I don't want to take for granted the time I have with him now. I am promised absolutely NOTHING as far as a time line is concerned with my loved ones here on earth. I have absolutely no idea what tomorrow holds let alone the next couple hours.

  Sure enough though I've hit a bit of a low today. I'm back to slippers on these wood floors and hot drinks all day. Except today I'm in a bit of a funk getting back into the groove.

  Today I'm reminded it's a good place to be to need Him. Really need Him. And so it's here in this home that I have to really grasp onto His grace and who He is. What He has for me. What He's called me to do. Who He's called me to be. And how when I do that I experience Him and His love. His life and heart changing effects. His desire for relationship with me.

  And it's all good. I am made new and I see past myself and these silly selfish desires. That's really what they are. I'm given glimpses of a heavenly perspective and a kingdom purpose and my spirit soars.

  Look what I get to do for Him!

  Not in the idea that there is anything I can ever do to acquire or attain something in order to ensure a sense of control, but because...Look what He did for me!

  What love He gave. What love He gives still.

  Whereas to one, days spent with mundane routine, a far cry from an extravagant lifestyle, and life and conversation with usually just 4 and under year olds would be the grand cause for a life crisis, to me (*when I see clearly!) it's beauty I get to do for Him. *note: WHEN!! I am that far cry from ever getting it right. Every new day and even every next minute I can tap into that grace and strength and let Him change my heart to a heart like His.

  Is that not what it's all about?

  Now is the hour to invest in today. Right now is the time to invest in relationships and where God has me today. It just so happens to be down one of the coolest dirt roads we've ever come across in Potsdam! With children that just so happen to be thee cutest on earth and living right here with us! HUH!? And with a husband who right now walks with a cane and booty-like cast and the cutest little strut I've ever seen. He already struts BAD but boy is it exemplified! My cure-all while I'm a foot and sprained ankle care giver... milkshakes, duh! I think I'm doing a splendid job but maybe you should really ask Gabe! With friends and an amazing church family we can serve this very real God with. With this God I can find all my purpose through.

  Which is none of me and ALL of Him.

  • 3:49 pm
  • 1 Comment